Pitfalls of a Non-Corn Dog-Mac'n'Cheese-Pizza-PB Sandwich Dinner

8:45pm (15 min after lights out)

C: Mooooo-my, I'm hungry.
Me: Well, when you only eat half of dinner you get hungry.
C: Well, I'm hungry.
Me: Yes, sweetie, I understand that but it's bedtime. You can have some water and then you need to get in your bed, please.
C: But I need REAL food. Water isn't REAL food! Aren't you going to take care of your child???
Me: I did give you real food at dinner and you chose not to eat it. We warned you that you'd be hungry at bedtime and there'd be no snacks except what was left from dinner. You chose not to eat that. Now, please get into your bed.
C: NO, I'm still hungry!
Me: ONE...
C: OKAY --> proceeds to slam door and cry right inside of door while playing with the door stop.
{10 minutes of crying}
C: I'm still hungry
***repeat above conversation***
C: {crying} Please stop breaking my heart... 
{silence}
C: It's broken now... the only way to fix it is you giving me real food... 
{silence}
C: {while crying} Now it's REALLY broken. I don't know if it can be fixed now...
{silence}
C: MOOOMMM!  Why are you being silent?  SPEAK TO ME!  Now my tummy is angry with me.  It just needs REAL food.
Me: Tell your tummy that I say NO and that it should have accepted the food that I offered it at dinner.  1/2 of a banana, a cutie orange and 1/2 of a dinner roll aren't enough and it knows that from previous experience.
C: {through tears} You're going to make my tummy SO angry!  It's going to yell at me.
Me: FINE!  Come down and pick out something. UGH!
C: {all cheery, in a sing-song voice} Okay!  What do we have?
Me: The same things we had an hour ago when you watched your brother pick out a bedtime snack.
C: I knoooow, but which of them isn't sugary so that I don't have to brush my teeth again?
Me: Just.  Pick.  A.  Snack!