Included in this post are a few more of my favorite photos that we got of Ty... I look at them all daily and cry, but that's good I think. Just wanted to share them with you all.
We have now gotten all of the lab reports back regarding what could have possibly gone wrong that could be detected through my blood, the placenta or the umbilical cord. As I feared, all of the tests came back "normal" or with "normal ranges." SO... Ty's death was not due to: anything I ate or inhaled (bacteria or viruses), a clotting disorder that could caused a clot in the placenta (which is good news for future pregnancies), chromosomal abnormalities that Ty could have had, any sort of trauma to the placenta (such as tearing away from the uterine wall or damage to the organ itself), and the umbilical cord had no knots in it and there didn't seem to have any trauma to it, either(which we already knew and also that it had not been wrapped around Ty's neck).
The one test that came back "normal" but on the lower end of "normal" was a test involving my thyroid. Apparently one of the levels of hormone or chemical produced by my thyroid were low, indicating that I could possibly be hyperthyroid, but pregnancy can also skew these results since the baby's thyroid doesn't begin working to it's full potential until after birth, so it pulls from the mother's thyroid. SO, I'll be getting a full thyroid work-up done at 6 weeks post delivery. Based on the research I've done so far, though, the only time there can be risk to the fetus due to the thyroid is when the mother is HYPOthyroid as opposed to HYPERthyroid. Like I said, the baby causes a higher demand on the thyroid (like it does on the pancreas and the increased need for insulin during pregnancy), so when the thyroid isn't working to it's potential is when there seems to be a higher risk for problems and stillbirth.
Still, it has been outrageously hard for me to not blame myself for not noticing Ty's lack of movement earlier in the day... I keep telling myself that I need to just accept the fact that whatever happened was out of my control and that there's nothing I could have done... that this is all part of God's plan and I need to accept this and be at peace with the fact that my little baby is safe in the arms of his Lord and Savior for the rest of eternity, but to be honest I am beyond jealous of my gracious God. In one respect I know that jealousy is wrong and I should be thankful for all of the blessings I have been given, but I also know in my heart that if I wasn't feeling this jealousy something would be wrong. I am a mother and it's perfectly normal for me to be jealous and to want to have my baby here in my arms.
I just ask that you keep praying for Brendan, Tegan and I. That you pray for peace in my heart and mind; that I allow myself to accept the reality and allow myself to continue to grow from this, to become a better and stronger person from this experience. Thank you so very much, again, for all of the support you have all provided us! Take care, God bless...
Our baby, our first baby, our big-little boy is 2 years old! I have been flooded with memories of that day all morning. The memories of waking up at 4:30am with excruciating labor pains, calling the midwife to tell her "it's time", driving to the hospital, walking from the car to the hospital doors when it was -20F, laboring through the pain until the epidural came at 9:30, pushing for 2 1/2 hours starting at 11:45am, and, finally, the rush of emotions when he was born at 2:11pm. And then there are memories of all sorts of milestones and events over the past 2 years that have made Tegan's life so VERY, VERY precious and special to all who have encountered him. 
I can't believe it's nearly over and couldn't be more excited! I'm sure as soon as Baby comes I'll miss being pregnant and having that connection that only a mother and child can have during pregnancy, but I'm excited to sleep ANYWAY I want (side, back or stomach!) I wake up nightly with aching hips from having to always sleep on my side. I'm also excited to no longer wear pants multiple inches above my belly button and only a few inches below my, um... chest. :)
Then we spent much of the afternoon doing... well... not too much at all. Brendan spun on the bike and I tried to nap, though without success. Still, it was nice to have the option. Finally, around 6pm or so we went to The Canadian Honker for a relaxing, but not too fancy, dinner.
Tegan ready to take the present and OPEN IT!
We even got some more "3D" pics of the little guy and we think he looks just like T-go did when he was born... minus a little facial fat, what do you think? We don't have a scanner at home, so the best I could do was take pictures of the images... enjoy!
my hair looks funny but it's really not my hair, it's a wreath hanging on the door behind me. HA! Also included are a few pics of T and I having fun :)
In this next one Tegan is singing the song he made up about Thomas [the Tank Engine]. It goes like this, "La-la-la, la-la-la, Tho-mas!" It's too cute when he sings it. :)
There you go, the first 120 words in ABC order (as we kindergarten teachers call it). I figured that'd be the best way to "present" them since I don't remember their order other than first was Daddy and then Mama and bai (pronounced bah-ee... who knows where he came up with that one). OH... and I forgot to include our daycare provider's name and the kids at daycare that he'll sometimes "talk" about... that'll add another 5 or so onto the list.
Hope you enjoy these silly pics and that they give you a good belly laugh :) 
Love to all!!!
~jenn
Well, I am now 22 weeks along and starting to feel a bit uncomfortable, especially after eating. I've been experiencing a lot of braxton hicks contractions, especially at night (I'll wake up and my stomach will be hard as a rock!) but nothing painful there, so that's good. Tegan continues to say "Hi Belly" or "Hi Baby" when I lift my shirt up over my tummy. Then he'll lean in and give it a kiss... and then promptly instruct me to "close" my shirt (i.e. pull it back down). He's too sweet. Feeling lots and lots of kicks, espeically at bed time, same as the case was with T-go when I was pregnant with him. 
Other than my cravings (still mostly for salty stuff) I'm realizing that these two pregnancies are very similar... except now I'm not so sure I'll develop Gestational Diabetes. For the longest time I was convinced it was only a matter of time before I started feeling the effects of high blood sugar levels after eating too many carbs, but it's not happening and this is right around when I think it started with Tegan. 2 more weeks and I'll be tested again, so we'll see. Hope you enjoyed the pics... Brendan took them :)
